what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Let's get the cat blown out
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
