I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
