Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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