It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
