when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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