Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
