you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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