If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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