you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
