im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
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