There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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