The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Help. Why am I so naked?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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