all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize