i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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