I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize