how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Do vagina's smell?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
