Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize