I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
