We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
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i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
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So much rum. So many feels.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
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