I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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