I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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