My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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