On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I use my feet as sexual weapons
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
