mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
