of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
