I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
