Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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