Yo dont text me then not text me
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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