It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
