maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
