I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
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