oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
