Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
