yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
please don't ironically join a cult
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