Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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