he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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