Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
