She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
