Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
23 People Have Step Parents That Are Younger Than Them
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background