And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
