I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize