you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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