that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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