I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
