Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
