yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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