Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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