If i could tip my vagina, i would.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize