If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
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I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
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That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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