and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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